Really, I believe I'm betting my life on something uncertain. It's like I've spent a lifetime struggling step by step to "bump" in life and now willing to risk all my achievements for one purpose, which is not real and has no guarantee of being, but that is idealized by my mind.
Maybe my achievements are just a device which makes me believe that I should not risking by making a decision that will define the rest of my life. For there is the risk of falling into the abyss and having to climb rung by rung again and face all the challenges of starting first.
But it is worth staying in this life? I'm really living? I think I risking, because I have nothing to lose. And if I can achieve my goals,