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Startups Lie

ContractIQ
ContractIQ

This document mocks common excuses and misleading statements made by startup founders. It satirizes claims about successful customer calls and meetings that did not actually provide value, positive monthly progress that was flat, missed meetings due to all-nighters spent online rather than working, and statements about priorities that do not match actual motivations like seeking investor funding. The overall tone is skeptical of exaggerated founder claims and highlights the importance of transparency about startup challenges and progress.

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LIE STARTUPS DIE
Yes we got some term sheets (downloaded from Legalzoom!)
Just got off a great call with a customer! (who happened to show no interest in anything we do!)
Sorry I cant meet you. Just pulled an all nighter! (Reading Quora)
This month has been particularly good for us! (Like the last month which was flat too!)
Oops. Id be on a plane that day. Sorry, cant make it! (Hey..I took a bus indeed. But thats to be in touch with the zeitgeist)
I agree with your perspective as an investor. We would try that approach! (may be when you do your startup)
Yep. We are a lean startup. (We iterate on different startup ideas, on every month)
We plan to move to SFO, in the coming year! (or the next or the one after)
Content rules. I agree. SEO is dead. (Id secretly embalm it, just in case!)
Money has never been our motivation (Except the kind that investors give)
Relax. Say good bye to freelance sites & Google. The good mobile & web development agencies are here! POST A REQUIREMENT FIND AN AGENCY Its free & we are around if you need help! (See how life gets better with ContractIQ!) We made this deck to entertain you (and to say that we are launching a marketplace of awesome dev shops) Grab a special freebie, now! Email info@contractiq.com with title Freebie

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Startups Lie

  • 2. Yes we got some term sheets (downloaded from Legalzoom!)
  • 3. Just got off a great call with a customer! (who happened to show no interest in anything we do!)
  • 4. Sorry I cant meet you. Just pulled an all nighter! (Reading Quora)
  • 5. This month has been particularly good for us! (Like the last month which was flat too!)
  • 6. Oops. Id be on a plane that day. Sorry, cant make it! (Hey..I took a bus indeed. But thats to be in touch with the zeitgeist)
  • 7. I agree with your perspective as an investor. We would try that approach! (may be when you do your startup)
  • 8. Yep. We are a lean startup. (We iterate on different startup ideas, on every month)
  • 9. We plan to move to SFO, in the coming year! (or the next or the one after)
  • 10. Content rules. I agree. SEO is dead. (Id secretly embalm it, just in case!)
  • 11. Money has never been our motivation (Except the kind that investors give)
  • 12. Relax. Say good bye to freelance sites & Google. The good mobile & web development agencies are here! POST A REQUIREMENT FIND AN AGENCY Its free & we are around if you need help! (See how life gets better with ContractIQ!) We made this deck to entertain you (and to say that we are launching a marketplace of awesome dev shops) Grab a special freebie, now! Email info@contractiq.com with title Freebie