20 Things I Believe
1 . Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me for the path is narrow. In fact, just buzz off and leave me alone.
2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and a flat tire.
3. The darkest hour is just before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's milk, that's the time to do it.
4. Sex is like air. It's not important unless you aren't getting any.
5. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
6. No one is listening until you pass gas.
7. Always remember you're unique. Just like everyone else.
8. Never test the depth of the water with
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