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By Jeanne Acton, UIL/ILPC Journalism Director
Feature Writing

Feature Writing …
tells the reader a story. It has a
beginning (lead), middle and end.
It uses quotes liberally and allows
the reader to see the story through
detailed description and vivid
writing.

Transition/Quote
Formula
Lead: Most interesting information.
Something that will grab the reader's attention
and drag them into the story.
Nut Graph: A summary of what the story
is going to be about. Why the story is
important.
Direct Quote: Connects to the nut graph.
Use more than one sentence. Direct quotes
should show the emotion of the story.
Transition: Next important fact. Use
transition words to help the story flow. They
can be facts, indirect quotes or partial quotes.
Direct Quote: Connects to the first
transition. Do not repeat the transition in the
quote. DQ should elaborate on the transition.
Transition: Next important fact. Use
transition words to help the story flow. They
can be facts, indirect quotes or partial quotes.
Direct Quote: Connects to the second
transition. Do not repeat the transition in the
quote. DQ should elaborate on the transition.
Linked
Linked
Linked
And so on… until the story is complete

Let's start at the
beginning with …
LEADS

The opening sentence must grab and
hold the reader's attention by using
specific, interest-arousing words.
Leads

The lead must catch the spirit of the story
and create the proper tone: serious,
sarcastic, ironic, flippant, melancholy.
Leads

Leads
 Can be and often are longer than one
sentence
 Your chance to grab the reader's
attention
 Should be specific to your story
 Should not be filled with cliches
 Should be in third person
 Must fit the mood or tone of the story

A Few Types of Leads
 Narrative - tells a story
 Descriptive - describes a scene, person or
subject
 Direct Quote – must be used with narrative
 Startling statement
 Contrast and Compare (then and now)
 Twist

Narrative - tells a story
Justin Greer's 2,800 friends have never seen him cry.
His father has seen him cry only once — the day last
October when doctors told the 16-year-old football player
that what he thought was a bad case of the flu was actually
leukemia.
“He cried a bit then,” Mr. Greer said. “But then he
squared off and said, ‘Well, I’m not dead yet.’ And I
haven't seen him cry since, although he's told me that
sometimes he cries at night when he's all alone.”

Narrative - tells a story
On senior Alicia Brigg's two-hour trip with her
parents to church, she turned around and noticed that in
the back of the Suburban all her bags were packed.
“All of the sudden, I realized I wasn't going to
church; I was on my way to the airport,” she said. “I
started screaming, crying and swearing at my dad,
trying to figure out what was happening.”
That's when her dad told his 17-year-old daughter he
had put her up for adoption.

Descriptive - describes a scene/person
It is 7:30 Thursday night and the Presbyterian
Church of Utica is deserted except for its well-lit
cafeteria.
Slowly they straggle in, single or in pairs. They are a
friendly, yet haggard group, bearing the signs of a long
emotional struggle.
They are the parents of problem teenagers. There are
no straight-A-honor roll students here. No football
captains or cheerleaders. Only drug addicts, alcoholics
and runaways.

Descriptive
It's too disturbing to watch the big screen TV at his
cousin's house. Too soon. Too real.
Instead, using his index fingers, Joshua Joseph twiddles
a Dove soap box, the one he used to scribble telephone
numbers on when he was evacuating.
He flips the box around. There's his girlfriend's number.
Backward.
His best friend's digits.
Forward.
His coach's number.
This is Joseph's cell phone now. His real one is lost,
somewhere back in New Orleans along with most of his
clothes, his family's house and life as he knew it.

Descriptive - describes a scene or person
Standing in the lunch line, the boy turned to April Haler
and asked, “Will you be my girlfriend?”
Then he turned to his buddy and started laughing.
Just another cruel joke on the fat kid.
April, who once weighed almost 300 pounds, is used to
them. Since elementary school she has been teased and
taunted about her weight.
“I remember being called horrible names in elementary
school every time we went to the playground,” the
sophomore said.
But life is changing.

Descriptive - describes a scene or person
Sarah Clark knows what they think. The smirks. The laughs.
The way the other girls, all week long in cheerleading practice,
have been rolling their eyes.
They think she's a joke.
They think she's a big fat joke of an eighth grader with no
prayer of becoming a high school cheerleader.
Minutes before her tryout, Sarah paces the corridor. She
sweeps the waves of her long copper hair back over her
shoulder. She tugs up on her socks and down on her cheerleader
skirt, pressed the night before.
Then, with her eyes open and in the privacy of her mind, she
mutters a prayer.
Dear God, please …
By 8 p.m. she’ll have her answer.

Direct Quote - use sparingly. Must be very
powerful quote
“Don't be mad. I took some pills,” Karen Keaton
cried as she stooped over the toilet.
A few hours later, the 14-year-old freshman died
after a series of coronary arrests.

Direct Quote - use sparingly.
“Coach Hawkins!”
Brad Hawkins, the longtime Westlake athletic
trainer, recognized Coach Steven Ramsey's voice
over the noise of the spectators behind him. But he
had never heard Ramsey's voice like that.
Hawkins ran to Ramsey, who was crouched
over varsity player Matt Nader pleading with the
athlete.
“Hang in there.”
“Don't leave us.”
“Everything's going to be all right.”

Startling Statement - creates
drama
She never knew she had it.
______________________________________
Junior Josh Duckworth has a fetish.

Startling Statement/Narrative/Descriptive
Zackary Jargowsky hates pronouns.
He hates the “she” that sometimes slips out
when he's playing Quidditch with his friends, and the
“it” he's been labeled by the ones who don't understand.
He hates the prolonged stares as people try to
figure out what is going on beneath his “Nightmare
Before Christmas” hoodie and plaid, vertical striped
shirts — the ones the stylist said would help.

Startling Statement - creates
drama
Melissa hates school.
It's not that she's dumb. It isn’t that she doesn’t
fit in socially. In fact, it isn’t that anything is
particularly wrong.
It's more of a matter of nothing being particularly
right.

A group of candystripers stand around the nursery, holding
incubator babies. It's “loving time.” Another young girl steps in with
her mother and picks up a baby, too. She is not in a uniform, but in a
hospital gown, for the baby she holds is her own — and it's her
“loving time.”
It's also time to say good-bye.
“I sat in that rocker and held him and rocked him and I cried
and cried and cried,” Amber, a senior, said. “I wanted that moment to
last forever so I could always hold him and always be there for him.”
“But I knew I couldn't. That's what hurt.”
Twist - sets reader up for one mood and then
twists it, surprises the reader

Twist
How many children do you have?
A simple question. Unassuming. Perfect for small talk.
But Jim and Julie Silcock stumble.
Dec. 29, 2002 flashes in front of them. And they don't know
what to do.
Haltingly, Julie responds. We have one son named James. He
is a junior at Princeton.
But the questions don’t end there. For the past six years, they
never have.

After tension-filled hours of last-minute
primping, the time had come for the contestants
to walk into the arena and strut their stuff in
front of the three judges and an appreciative
crowd.
Some walked briskly with an air of
confidence. Others, distracted by the lights and
cameras, shuffled along slowly. A few, overcome
by the pressure, foamed at the mouth and
mooed.
Another Twist

Even though Saturday's market steer
competition at the Austin-Travis County Livestock
Show and Rodeo was like many other beauty
pageants, there were some obvious differences.
The contestants — steers weighing more than
half a ton — were being judged on the type of T-
bones and rump roasts they would turn into
instead of their appearance in an evening gown or
bathing suit.

A few more good ones …
By his own admission, Adan Peña was a lousy
student. Lazy. Apathetic. A typical junior high slacker. He
was heading in the direction of dropping out of school and
into a life of who knows what — at best, working on a
dairy farm. At worst, jail.

A few more good ones …
Louis Staggers smiles all the time. Not often. All.
The. Time.
“Louis is that kid who walks the hallway with the
biggest smile on his face,” says John Osborn, head
basketball coach at Belton High School.

Writing devices for leads
 Repetition (Melissa)
 Short, punchy sentences. Fragments. (Joshua, Louis)
 Using dialogue (adoption, Matt)
 Mixing sentence length to set a rhythm (adopt, rodeo)
 Breaking the rules … starting with “And”

The lead should open
with the specific,
then go to the general.

Rather than:
With America engaged in a war in Iraq, many
students know U.S. military men who have lost
their lives.
Leaguetown lost one of its own last month
when Nicolas Barrera was killed in Iraq.

Try this:
When Briana Barrera didn’t hear from her son,
Nicolas, for a week she knew something was
wrong. Maybe it was mother's intuition, but she
knew.
And when she saw two officers walking toward
her door, her worst fear was confirmed.
“The officers said they were sorry to deliver the
news, but Nicolas died with honor,” she said.
“Dying with honor? How does that help? My heart
was breaking. My boy was gone.”

• News or editorials leads. Avoid
first and second person.
• Stating the obvious.
• Using cliches.
• “Imagine this…” leads
Lead writing pitfalls:

Freshman Sarah Clark made the cheerleader
squad for the 2007-08 school year.
Congratulations to Sarah Clark for making the
cheerleading squad. We are proud of her.
No news or editorials leads.
Avoid first and second person

Every day, millions of people wake up, go to
work or go to school. But some days, they don't.
Millions of teenagers have jobs. They work
for many reasons: college, cars, just to have
some spending money in their pocket.
Don't state the obvious

Take one for the team.
Life is short.
And the winner is . . .
No cliches

Do not “Imagine this…”
Imagine what it would be like to sit through
a hurricane.
Dallas-resident Carly Patty doesn’t have to.
She was stranded in Galveston during
Hurricane Ike.
Imagine what it would be like to be on a boat
that is sinking in the middle of the ocean.
Daniel Palacios doesn’t have to imagine. He
was on his grandfather's boat over spring break
when it capsized.

Senior Daniel Palacios planned to spend
spring break on a relaxing fishing trip in Port
Aransas with his father, grandfather and two uncles.
Instead, he spent most of the week praying to stay
alive.
Try this instead…

After a strong lead…
You need a strong nut
graph.

What is a nut graph?
Basically, it is a summary of what
the story is going to be about. It's the
5 Ws and H that you didn’t answer
in the lead.
It's the thesis sentence of your
story.

Senior Daniel Palacios planned to spend spring
break on a relaxing fishing trip in Port Aransas with
his father, grandfather and two uncles. Instead, he
spent most of the week praying to stay alive.
On the second night of Daniel's family fishing trip,
his grandfather's boat filled with water and capsized.
For three days, Daniel sat on top of the capsized boat,
hoping he and his family would be rescued.
“I don’t know if I have ever prayed so much in my
life,” Daniel said. “I made a few bargains with God
during those three days.”
On the third day, after the Coast Guard called off
its search, a fishing boat found the men.
“It was a miracle,” Daniel said. “As soon as we
were rescued, we all got on our knees to pray and
thank God.”
The Nut
Graph

After a strong lead and an
informative nut graph…
Use the Transition/Quote
formula

Senior Daniel Palacios planned to spend spring break on a
relaxing fishing trip in Port Aransas with his father,
grandfather and two uncles. Instead, he spent most of the
week praying to stay alive.
On the second night of Daniel's family fishing trip, his
grandfather's boat filled with water and capsized. For three
days, Daniel sat on top of the capsized boat, hoping he and
his family would be rescued.
“I don’t know if I have ever prayed so much in my life,”
Daniel said. “I made a few bargains with God during those
three days.”
On the third day, after the Coast Guard called off its
search, a fishing boat found the men.
“It was a miracle,” Daniel said. “As soon as we were
rescued, we all got on our knees to pray and thank God.”
transition
direct quote

On April 2, Daniel will share his miracle story when he
and his family go on the “Today Show.”
“I am a little hesitant to go on the ‘Today Show,’” Daniel
said. “I am a pretty shy guy, and I don't relish the spotlight.
My grandparents love that show, though. My dad and I knew
it would be a highlight of my grandpa's life if he was on the
show.”
Daniel's “miracle” story began on March 11 when his
grandfather's boat started sinking.
“We tried to pump the water out, but the pumps wouldn’t
start,” he said. “It took about three hours for the boat to fill
and capsize. My grandfather fired off three flares, hoping a
nearby oil rig would see us, but no one came.”
As the boat filled with water, Daniel's father passed out
life jackets.
“He said the plan was to sit on top of the boat until we
were rescued,” he said. “My dad managed to get several
packages of crackers and candy bars into a bag just as the boat
was capsizing.”
transition
direct quote
transition
direct quote
direct quote
transition

So how do you end
a feature story?

End your story with …
- A powerful quote
Or
- Tie the ending back to the lead

For example:
(Lead) “Don't be mad. I took some pills,” Karen
Keaton cried as she stooped over the toilet.
A few hours later, the 14-year-old freshman
died after a series of coronary arrests.
(Ending) Since the death of her oldest daughter, the
Keatons have found themselves becoming more
protective. “I find myself watching for things,” Mrs.
Keaton said. “I’m not sure for what. I’m just
watching.”

For example:
(Lead) A group of candystripers stand around the
nursery, holding incubator babies. It's “loving time.”
Another young girls steps in with her mother and picks
up a baby, too. She is not in a uniform, but a in a
hospital gown, for the baby she holds is her own — and
it's her “loving time.”
It's also time to say good-bye.
“I sat in that rocker and held him and rocked
him and I cried and cried and cried,” Amber, a senior,
said. “I wanted that moment to last forever so I could
always hold him and always be there for him.”
“But I knew I couldn’t. That's what hurt.”

(Ending) This was evident as she stated the one word that
described the whole ordeal:
“Pain,” she said, tears streaming down her cheeks
and falling onto her sweater.
“True pain.”

For a Strong Feature Story
remember this …
GQ STUDD

G
Q
S
T
U
D
D
Great
Quotes
Strong Lead
Transition/Quote Formula
Unique Angle
Description - Show Don't Tell
Detail

Yes, you can …
 Use the first name on the second
reference if the story is about a
student.
 Add plausible description to flesh
out your lead
 Have a lead longer than one
paragraph

Pitfalls to avoid in feature writing …
 Using a news lead
 Writing in the passive voice
 Using too many adverbs and adjectives
instead of specific nouns and powerful
verbs
 Messy handwriting
 Story doesn’t flow – doesn’t use T/Q
formula
 Lack of strong quotes

On contest day …
 Read the entire prompt
 Take a moment. Remember what
stands out to you. Try to use that for your
lead.
 Reread the prompt and highlight or
underline powerful quotes.
 Also, mark your nut graph (usually
the news peg) in the prompt.
 Cross out any unnecessary quotes or
people.
 Write.

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