際際滷

際際滷Share a Scribd company logo

Final assignment

Download as DOCX, PDF
samra iqbal
samra iqbal

The document discusses key aspects of paragraph organization, including unity, coherence, faulty starts, lack of topic sentences, and development of ideas. It provides examples of original student paragraphs that demonstrate issues with organization and suggests improvements. The document also addresses choosing appropriate vocabulary and provides an example of a student paragraph with vocabulary issues to discuss.

1 of 9
Download to read offline
Presented to: MaamAmina Shahid Department Of English Language and Literature 2013 Paragraph Writing Organization of the Paragraph Presented by: SYED HASSAN RAZA SAMRA IQBAL TEHREEM AFZAL SUMMERA YASMEEN
CALL Presentation 1 - Organization of the paragraph t Unity C Coherence Faulty Start Start Lack of Topic Sentence Development of the ideas b Vocabulary choice Paragraph writing
CALL Presentation 2 ny Type of writing, whether it is Creative, Descriptive, Legal, or Business oriented, requires some skills to make it Impressive. Writing of any sort if lacks concisenessi it bothers the reader. Faulty mechanics cannot be tolerated as well. Certain skills should be adopted to make writing effective. This work suggests some skills for a striking writing style. Here we will discuss how to construct a suitable paragraph, which will further help us in any style of writing. Paragraph Writing In Process Writing, we have emphasized the fact that it is very hard for the teacher to concentrate on both the grammar and the organization errors on a student paper and still not discourage the student with those red marks all over the paper. Instead, we have suggested that the students should be able to comment on and edit their own paper to a certain extent. The advantages of such an approach would be raising awareness of the student and reducing the workload of the teacher. . There may be many ways to correct a mistake. The examples given here are all original beginner level papers.1 1 Concise A
CALL Presentation 3 1. ORGANIZATION OF THE PARAGRAPH A. Unity: It means that all the sentences refer to the main idea, or the topic of the paragraph. Exercise 1: The original student paper: In a unified paragraph, we expect all the sentences to be about the main idea of the paragraph. The main idea in this paragraph is "the descriptionii of your house". If we examine the paragraph, we see that some sentences do not describe the house, such as: In weekdays I arrive home at five o'clock and I have lunch. Then I do my homework and go to bed. I live in a flat with my family. We have two bedrooms and a living room. We have a garden and we have some flowers there. In weekdays I arrive home at five o clock and I have lunch. Then I do my homework and go to bed. I have a Computer but it does not work. I have a brother and a sister and I think I am very lucky to live them. Sometimes our relatives visit us. Our flat becomes very crowded sometimes but I like it.
CALL Presentation 4 B. Coherence: It means that the sentences should be organized in a logical manner and should follow a definite plan of development. Exercise 2: The original student paper: I live in a house in Karachi. It isn't old or modern. It's a normal traditional house. We can say it is near the sea. It takes about 10 minutes to go to the sea side on foot. We have one bedroom, one living room. We also have two other rooms, too. We use them as a dining room. Naturally, we have a kitchen, a bathroom, and a toilet. I live with my parents. And our house has a little garden; my parents spend their time there to grow vegetables and fruit. First, let's see the order of the ideas: 1. Where the house is 2. Type of the house 3. The location 4. The rooms in the house 5. The fact that he lives with his parents 6. The garden The paragraph is well organized until he says he lives with his parents. It looks like this idea interruptediii his description of the house. It should be put somewhere else in the paragraph.
CALL Presentation 5 C. Faulty Start: Here are some ways to bore your readers to death (!) when starting a paragraph/an essay: You can start with: A nonsense sentence: E.g. I want to talk about X. A clich辿: e.g. X plays a great role in our lives. o X is a very important issue in today's world. Exercise 3 : Here is an example: I want to talk about friendship. Friends can change your life. So, you must know who is a real friend. Firstly, your friend must understand you and of course, you must understand her, too. I think, another important point in a friendship is confidence. You mustn't tell lies to each other. In addition, you must say everything about yourself. I think these are important for a friendship. If you have a friend like this, you don't break up with her because a real friend is not found easily. How do we understand that "I want to talk about friendship." is a nonsenseiv sentence? If we leave the nonsense sentence out, the content and meaning of the paragraph does not change. See Example:
riends play great roles in our lives so we must know our friends. Firstly, your friend must understand you and of course, you must understand her, too. I think another important point in a friendship is confidence. You mustn't tell lies to each other. In addition, you must say everything about yourself. I think these are important for a friendship. If you have a friend like this, you don't break up with her because a real friend is not found easily. D. Lack of Topic Sentence: Topic sentence is the main idea, your attitude, your evaluation of something. Having no topic sentence is bad both for the writer and the reader. First, the reader has to read the entire paragraph to get to the point. Here, the example is one paragraph long. What if the example was a paper of 2-3 pages? This is one side. Lack of a topic sentence also causes the writer to drift away from the topic. He loses control over the writing. He may write 3 sentences about one controlling idea and 1 for the other which causes an imbalancev within 2 the writing. Exercise 4: Try to write only a topic sentence for this paragraph. A good friend is a person who doesn't tell me lies, who helps me and let me help him, and who I can talk to in trust. 2 Description F
E. Development of the ideas: It means that every idea discussed in the paragraph should be adequatelyvi explained and supported through evidence and examples. We generally believe that people would easily understand us when we write. Unfortunately, our use of language may not be perfect and our ideas may be different. If we want our ideas to be understood, we need to explain them and give specific examples of each. Listing our ideas is never enough. See the example below: Exercise 5: irst of all, a friend mustn't tell lie. He must always tell me the truth and he must be honest because if there is honesty between two friends, their relationship will last until death. In addition to honesty, helping or being near a friend on a bad day is very important. Another point to consider is that he must criticize me if I make a mistake F T There are three qualities that I need to see in a good friend. A good friend should not tell lies. I need to trust him so that I can talk to him. Second a good friend should be there when I needed him. I should be able to find him near me when I am in a bad mood or when I have a problem. Finally, when necessary, he should criticize me so that I can change my undesirable behavior or see where I am wrong. I think these three qualities are the basic properties in a good friend.
2. VOCABULARY CHOICE: Many reasons play a role in our vocabulary mistakes. There are some English words and expressions that are confused throughout the world where English is used. There even are dictionaries of common language errors. For example, effect/affect, advise/advice. There are sites dedicated to these common errors and related exercises amongst the links we have provided. Exercise 6: Let's read the original student paragraph below and then discuss the issue: Friends play a great role in our lives. They effect our lives negatifly or positifly. We should choose them very carefully. First, we can look at his behaviors. After that, we can look at his activities. It is very important to do something together. We must beware of people who has bad habits such as smoking, bad speaking, etc. Some people don't think so but I think finally we should look at his phsical aparians because if you have diffirent physical aparianse than him, you can't be relaxable. For example if you are taller than him, this generally does unrelaxable to him. As a consequently, it is very important to choose a friend according to your especialities.

More Related Content

Final assignment

  • 1. Presented to: MaamAmina Shahid Department Of English Language and Literature 2013 Paragraph Writing Organization of the Paragraph Presented by: SYED HASSAN RAZA SAMRA IQBAL TEHREEM AFZAL SUMMERA YASMEEN
  • 2. CALL Presentation 1 - Organization of the paragraph t Unity C Coherence Faulty Start Start Lack of Topic Sentence Development of the ideas b Vocabulary choice Paragraph writing
  • 3. CALL Presentation 2 ny Type of writing, whether it is Creative, Descriptive, Legal, or Business oriented, requires some skills to make it Impressive. Writing of any sort if lacks concisenessi it bothers the reader. Faulty mechanics cannot be tolerated as well. Certain skills should be adopted to make writing effective. This work suggests some skills for a striking writing style. Here we will discuss how to construct a suitable paragraph, which will further help us in any style of writing. Paragraph Writing In Process Writing, we have emphasized the fact that it is very hard for the teacher to concentrate on both the grammar and the organization errors on a student paper and still not discourage the student with those red marks all over the paper. Instead, we have suggested that the students should be able to comment on and edit their own paper to a certain extent. The advantages of such an approach would be raising awareness of the student and reducing the workload of the teacher. . There may be many ways to correct a mistake. The examples given here are all original beginner level papers.1 1 Concise A
  • 4. CALL Presentation 3 1. ORGANIZATION OF THE PARAGRAPH A. Unity: It means that all the sentences refer to the main idea, or the topic of the paragraph. Exercise 1: The original student paper: In a unified paragraph, we expect all the sentences to be about the main idea of the paragraph. The main idea in this paragraph is "the descriptionii of your house". If we examine the paragraph, we see that some sentences do not describe the house, such as: In weekdays I arrive home at five o'clock and I have lunch. Then I do my homework and go to bed. I live in a flat with my family. We have two bedrooms and a living room. We have a garden and we have some flowers there. In weekdays I arrive home at five o clock and I have lunch. Then I do my homework and go to bed. I have a Computer but it does not work. I have a brother and a sister and I think I am very lucky to live them. Sometimes our relatives visit us. Our flat becomes very crowded sometimes but I like it.
  • 5. CALL Presentation 4 B. Coherence: It means that the sentences should be organized in a logical manner and should follow a definite plan of development. Exercise 2: The original student paper: I live in a house in Karachi. It isn't old or modern. It's a normal traditional house. We can say it is near the sea. It takes about 10 minutes to go to the sea side on foot. We have one bedroom, one living room. We also have two other rooms, too. We use them as a dining room. Naturally, we have a kitchen, a bathroom, and a toilet. I live with my parents. And our house has a little garden; my parents spend their time there to grow vegetables and fruit. First, let's see the order of the ideas: 1. Where the house is 2. Type of the house 3. The location 4. The rooms in the house 5. The fact that he lives with his parents 6. The garden The paragraph is well organized until he says he lives with his parents. It looks like this idea interruptediii his description of the house. It should be put somewhere else in the paragraph.
  • 6. CALL Presentation 5 C. Faulty Start: Here are some ways to bore your readers to death (!) when starting a paragraph/an essay: You can start with: A nonsense sentence: E.g. I want to talk about X. A clich辿: e.g. X plays a great role in our lives. o X is a very important issue in today's world. Exercise 3 : Here is an example: I want to talk about friendship. Friends can change your life. So, you must know who is a real friend. Firstly, your friend must understand you and of course, you must understand her, too. I think, another important point in a friendship is confidence. You mustn't tell lies to each other. In addition, you must say everything about yourself. I think these are important for a friendship. If you have a friend like this, you don't break up with her because a real friend is not found easily. How do we understand that "I want to talk about friendship." is a nonsenseiv sentence? If we leave the nonsense sentence out, the content and meaning of the paragraph does not change. See Example:
  • 7. riends play great roles in our lives so we must know our friends. Firstly, your friend must understand you and of course, you must understand her, too. I think another important point in a friendship is confidence. You mustn't tell lies to each other. In addition, you must say everything about yourself. I think these are important for a friendship. If you have a friend like this, you don't break up with her because a real friend is not found easily. D. Lack of Topic Sentence: Topic sentence is the main idea, your attitude, your evaluation of something. Having no topic sentence is bad both for the writer and the reader. First, the reader has to read the entire paragraph to get to the point. Here, the example is one paragraph long. What if the example was a paper of 2-3 pages? This is one side. Lack of a topic sentence also causes the writer to drift away from the topic. He loses control over the writing. He may write 3 sentences about one controlling idea and 1 for the other which causes an imbalancev within 2 the writing. Exercise 4: Try to write only a topic sentence for this paragraph. A good friend is a person who doesn't tell me lies, who helps me and let me help him, and who I can talk to in trust. 2 Description F
  • 8. E. Development of the ideas: It means that every idea discussed in the paragraph should be adequatelyvi explained and supported through evidence and examples. We generally believe that people would easily understand us when we write. Unfortunately, our use of language may not be perfect and our ideas may be different. If we want our ideas to be understood, we need to explain them and give specific examples of each. Listing our ideas is never enough. See the example below: Exercise 5: irst of all, a friend mustn't tell lie. He must always tell me the truth and he must be honest because if there is honesty between two friends, their relationship will last until death. In addition to honesty, helping or being near a friend on a bad day is very important. Another point to consider is that he must criticize me if I make a mistake F T There are three qualities that I need to see in a good friend. A good friend should not tell lies. I need to trust him so that I can talk to him. Second a good friend should be there when I needed him. I should be able to find him near me when I am in a bad mood or when I have a problem. Finally, when necessary, he should criticize me so that I can change my undesirable behavior or see where I am wrong. I think these three qualities are the basic properties in a good friend.
  • 9. 2. VOCABULARY CHOICE: Many reasons play a role in our vocabulary mistakes. There are some English words and expressions that are confused throughout the world where English is used. There even are dictionaries of common language errors. For example, effect/affect, advise/advice. There are sites dedicated to these common errors and related exercises amongst the links we have provided. Exercise 6: Let's read the original student paragraph below and then discuss the issue: Friends play a great role in our lives. They effect our lives negatifly or positifly. We should choose them very carefully. First, we can look at his behaviors. After that, we can look at his activities. It is very important to do something together. We must beware of people who has bad habits such as smoking, bad speaking, etc. Some people don't think so but I think finally we should look at his phsical aparians because if you have diffirent physical aparianse than him, you can't be relaxable. For example if you are taller than him, this generally does unrelaxable to him. As a consequently, it is very important to choose a friend according to your especialities.