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Love Is Letting Go Of Fear
 Story as told by Jerald Jampolsky, MD
(psychiatrist):
 The episode took place in 1951 at Stanford
Lane Hospital, which was then located in San
Francisco

The situation was one in which I felt trapped and
immobilized by fear. I was feeling emotional
pain, and thought I was threatened with potential
physical pain. The past was certainly coloring
my perception of the present, and I was surely
not experiencing inner peace or joy.

I was called at 2 AM. one Sunday morning to
see a patient on the locked psychiatric ward who
had suddenly gone berserk. The patient, whom I
had not seen before, had been admitted the
previous afternoon with a diagnosis of acute
schizophrenia. About ten minutes before I saw
him, he had removed the wooden molding from
around the door.

I looked through the small window in the door, and
saw a man six feet four inches tall weighing 280
pounds. He was running around the room nude,
carrying this large piece of wood with nails sticking
out, and talking gibberish. I really didn't know what to
do. There were two male nurses, both of whom
seemed scarcely five feet tall, who said, "We will be
right behind you, Doc." I didn’t find that reassuring.

As I continued to look through the window, I
began to recognize how scared the patient was,
and then it began to trickle into my
consciousness how scared I was. All of a
sudden it occurred to me that he and I had a
common bond that might allow for unity-namely,
that we were both scared.

Not knowing what else to do, I yelled through the
thick door, "My name is Dr. Jampolsky and I want to
come in and help you, but I'm scared. I'm scared that I
might get hurt, and I'm scared you might get hurt, and I
can't help wondering if you aren't scared, too." With
this, he stopped his gibberish, turned around and said,
“You're goddamn right, I'm scared."

I continued yelling to him, telling him how scared
I was, and he was yelling back how scared he
was. In a sense we became therapists to each
other. As we talked, our fear disappeared and
our voices calmed down. He then allowed me to
walk in alone, talk with him and give him some
oral medication and leave.

This was a very powerful and important learning
experience for me. At first I saw the patient as a
potential enemy who was going to hurt me. (My
past told me that anyone who seemed disturbed
and had a club in his hand was dangerous.) I
chose not to use the manipulative device of
authority which would have only servedthe
purpose of creating more fear and separation.

When I found a common bond in our fearful
attitudes and sincerely asked for his help, he
joined me. We were then in a position of helping
each other. When I saw this patient as my
teacher rather than my enemy. he helped me
recognize that perhaps we are all equally insane
and that it is only the form of our insanity that is
different.

I am determined today that all my thoughts be
free from fear, guilt or condemnation, whether Of
myself or others, by repeating: I can elect to
change all thoughts that hurt.
Found in “Love Is Letting Go Of Fear” by Jerald
G. Jampolsky MD (1979). Page 124 – 126.

Uploaded by:
Guy C. Lamunyon MSN, RN
Director of Nursing
University Nursing Instructor
Army Psych Mental Health Nurse, Retired

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Love ls letting go of fear

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