Mind it 2 how unrealistic expectations hamper our relationships
- 1. Interaction in modes Ignorance: Destruction Passion: Domination Goodness: Discussion
- 2. Interaction in modes Ignorance: Victim mentality Passion: Victor mentality Goodness: Partner mentality
- 3. Expectation in modes Ignorance: Everything will go wrong Passion: Everything will go right Goodness: Lets focus on the right and manage the wrong
- 4. Expectation in modes Maximizer: I want the best deal Optimizer: I will look for the best in the situation
- 5. Maximizer mentality makes for misery Disappointment: No product lives up to the expectation created by the effort Nagging fear, Might have got a better deal Frustration: When some better product comes up
- 6. Maximizer mentality in relationships Dream of perfect relationship Never settle for what we have If ever there was a ideal society, we wouldnt be allowed into it
- 7. Overexpectation When we have the whole world depicted in the media as our reference point, the real world always seems pale
- 8. Solution Dont depress yourself; depress your expectation of others and of yourself
- 9. Ambition vs Satisfaction Focus on giving the best contribution, not getting the best reward Focus on what is in your control
- 10. Demystifying Gita 2.47 Goals are what we set to maximize our effort Results are what we get based on factors beyond our control Be detached from results, not goals
- 11. Demystifying Gita 2.47 Karma + Daiva + Kala = Phala When we are spiritually mature, our happiness comes from our karma, not the phala
- 12. Maximize spiritually Krishna all-attractive, all- loving, all-available His love for us is based on who he is, not who we are
- 13. Balancing vertical-horizontal relationship In dependence on Krishna is Independence Only independent people can be interdependent