The paradox of Perfection - why performance pressure counteracts leadership
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Global Leadership Platform - April 5th 2025 - Kasteel de Vanenburg (Oragnization Ellen Tuenter)
The paradox of Perfection - why performance pressure counteracts leadership
- 1. Wico Mulder Innovation, Content & Networkadviseur (Mental) Health & Well-Being / Alles Is Gezondheid / SDG-3-IDG / Praktijk SALUT April 5th 2025 Castle de Vanenburg Putten Netherlands www.instagram.com/wicommunicate/ INSPIRATION DAY - GLOBAL LEADERSHIP PLATFORM WHY PERFORMANCE PRESSURE COUNTERACTS LEADERSHIP
- 3. I'VE NEVER DONE IT BEFORE AND I THINK I CAN
- 4. Netwerkadviseur (Mentale) Gezondheid & Welbevinden
- 9. GABOR MATE - AUTHENTICITEIT & VEILIGHEID -
- 12. WWW.ZIEMIJNU.NL JONGEREN MET ONBEGREPEN LICHAMELIJKE KLACHTEN DURF OP ZOEK TE GAAN NAAR HET SIGNAAL ACHTER DE KLACHT Bundel No 3 2024 Jongeren / Zelfherstel Doeboek
- 16. EXCERSIZE WHY ARE YOU HERE? (Ask the question why, 5 times)
- 17. Leadership is about Navigating through Life with Fear, Fun & Chaos HOW ?
- 18. WHAT ARE YOU AFRAID OF?
- 20. LEADERSHIP over others means Taking leadership over YOURSELF first Walk your own life path from awareness Manage your (inner) conflict Improve your inner dialogue Create options & make (right) decisions
- 21. RESILIENCE / SELF-CONFIDENCE KEEPING BALANCE
- 22. SENSE OF BELONGING Verbondenheid / Autonomie / Competentie SENSE OF COHERENCE Begrijpelijk / Beheersbaar / Betekenisvol 2 Universele Natuurlijk Principes & Behoeftes m.b.t. de werkelijkheid / duiden van de wereld / betekenis geven / geluk ervaren Sense of Urgency
- 24. What do you dream about? HOME What is that like? I dont know but I know I need one We are on a quest for cake . Lets get going then You are LOVED . You bring to this world things that no one else can . What is the bravest thing you ever said HELP, asking for help is refusing to give up
- 25. THE TWO MOUNTAINS Sisyphus Fenix - Hercules
- 26. EGO (IQ) MUST ECO (EQ) WANT/ CAN
- 27. KNOWING YOURSELF IS THE BEGINNING OF ALL WISDOM - Socrates - Self-knowledge is the foundation of Emotional Maturity
- 29. AWARENESS What is the story about yourself that you keep on telling yourself over and over again? Do I have to be perfect to be valuable?
- 30. AWARENESS How does this story make you actually think & feel?
- 31. WHAT / WHO DRIVES YOU? WHERE ARE YOU GOING? WHAT'S HOLDING YOU BACK?
- 32. WHAT IS YOUR BUBBLE ? WHAT DOES IT LOOK LIKE ? WHO ARE YOU IN THAT BUBBLE ? WHAT IS YOUR DESIRE / DREAM ? IS THERE A WISH FOR CHANGE ?
- 33. SQ IQ EQ FQ PIRAMIDE VAN BALANS manage je energie 4 INTELLIGENTIES / DIMENSIES
- 34. CHANGE = RESISTANCE (Personal / Systemic) = - Moving towards the pain -
- 35. INTRINSIC MOTIVATION URGENCY INTEREST DO NOTHING > CONTEXT > YOURSELF EMOTIONAL PAIN - CHANGE - PURPOSE & MEANING NOW Must > Want > Can Transformatie is bereidheid tot loslaten Holding on to what is (avoidance)
- 36. You owe it to yourself to live a life thats yours
- 37. Afbeelding met tekst, Lettertype, schermopname, wit Door AI gegenereerde inhoud is mogelijk onjuist.
- 38. THE LIMINAL SPACE Gives rise to discussion / dialogue and resistance to whether or not to have the real conversation about really having to / being able to / wanting to go to shape that change that is really urgent & necessary.
- 39. WESTERN MODERN SOCIETY MERITOCRACY (Hyperfocus on IQ) This is a model of society in which the socio-economic position (social status) of each individual is based on his or her merits (merits, achievements & capacities). This is not directly about the disposition one has, but what one does with that disposition. One's own efforts determine which position one can take in society. ME Myself & I Performance Pressure / Power Society EGO Ikonomie Own Fault Principle Science -> Evidence Based Medicine The more you try to "control" performance, the less access you have to your true potential CITIUS, ALTIUS, FORTIUS (SNELLER, HOGER, STERKER)
- 40. NEOLIBERALISM Neoliberalism is a socio-economic ideology that has become dominant in many Western societies since the 1980s. It emphasizes individual responsibility, free market mechanisms, competition, and efficiency. Governments withdraw from social services, placing the focus on self-reliance and personal success The relationship between neoliberalism and performance pressure is closely intertwined and has a significant impact on both individuals and society
- 41. CRISIS (DESCARTESIAN?) IN SOCIETY & HEALTHCARE "Cogito, ergo sum I think therefore I am - Ren辿 Descartes (1596 - 1650). Body & mind are considered as two separate entities. The emphasis in society (care) is largely on the EBM treatment (IQ) of the body (FQ) as a purely physical biological entity -> separate from the emotional & spiritual aspects of being human. This manifests itself in various forms: fragmentation of care, medicalization, depersonalization of care and lack of empathy & communication. The (Mental) Health of young people is a consequence and signal of this crisis: Young people are the canary in the coal mine
- 42. Performance pressure as a result of Meritocracy, Neoliberalism and Descartes Individualization of success and failure: In a neoliberal society, success is seen as a personal achievement, while failure is regarded as an individual shortcoming. This increases the pressure to constantly perform and prove oneself. Culture of competition: With an emphasis on market forces and competition, a competitive atmosphere is also created in the workplace and in education. People feel constantly measured and evaluated based on performance and productivity. Flexibility and insecurity: Neoliberal reforms have led to flexible labor contracts and job insecurity. As a result, people must continuously prove their value to retain their jobs or positions. Self-optimization and perfectionism: The focus on self-development and personal growth fits within the neoliberal logic. People are encouraged to continuously work on themselves, both physically and mentally, to remain competitive.
- 43. How objective is what you observe? You look with a chosen lens (from a certain history / paradigm) .... DISCUSION OR DIALOGUE
- 44. Impact on (Mental) Health Burnout, stress, and anxiety disorders have increased in societies where neoliberal values are dominant Young people experience growing performance pressure in school and social life as they prepare for a future where they must "compete" on the job market as individuals More and more voices advocate for a more collective approach to well- being, focusing on collaboration, solidarity, and meaningfulness Initiatives such as positive psychology, the sharing economy, and systemic leadership offer a counterbalance to neoliberal performance pressure.
- 45. SKILL = Your Conscious Development "What You Do Its the result of effort + experience + learning TALENT = Your Natural Potential "Who You Are Comes often from within and connected to purpose & meaning THE PARADOX Talent without skill is -> wasted potential Skill without talent leads to -> burnout The difference between TALENT and SKILL is subtle but profound
- 46. The idea that the pursuit of perfection often leads to dissatisfaction It highlights the tension between striving for excellence and the inherent imperfections of being human
- 47. UNATTAINABLE STANDARD: Perfection is often an ideal that can never be fully achieved. The more we chase it, the more we become aware of our flaws and limitations. FEAR OF FAILURE: The desire to be perfect can lead to procrastination, anxiety, and even avoidance of challenges due to the fear of not meeting unrealistic expectations. CREATIVITY AND GROWTH BLOCKED: True creativity and innovation often stem from trial and error, mistakes, and learning from failure. The obsession with perfection can stifle creativity and prevent personal growth. HUMAN CONNECTION LOST: Perfectionism can create a distance from others, as vulnerability and authenticity which are essential for deep connections, are often sacrificed in the pursuit of appearing flawless. THE IRONY OF IMPERFECTION: Ironically, embracing imperfection and authenticity often leads to better outcomes and more meaningful experiences than striving for an unattainable ideal. KEY ASPECTS OF THIS PARADOX
- 51. As long as we are not in CONNECTION with ourselves, we cannot create a new society that needs to be much more connecting. It is not just about fighting disease. It is about being, becoming & staying (mentally) healthy Prof. Dr. Jan Rotmans SALUTOGENESE
- 53. - CONNECTION - SAFETY & AUTHENTICITY Safety is not the absence of danger, but the presence of real connection
- 54. SENSE OF BELONGING Verbondenheid / Autonomie / Competentie SENSE OF COHERENCE Begrijpelijk / Beheersbaar / Betekenisvol 2 Universele Natuurlijk Principes & Behoeftes m.b.t. de werkelijkheid / duiden van de wereld / betekenis geven / geluk ervaren Sense of Urgency
- 56. ADVERSE CHILDHOOD EXPERIENCES (粥遺掘S)
- 57. The essence of living a good life is based on our ability to: know who you are Trauma is something that disrupts and even destroys this ability
- 59. - IDENTITY - WHO DO YOU CHOOSE TO BE? TELL ME WHO I AM ..
- 60. OUT ME WE THE ONLY WAY OUT IS GOING IN, THROUGH & UP IN ME + YOU = MWE
- 62. Afbeelding met tekst, binnen Automatisch gegenereerde beschrijving AWARNESS / FOCUS
- 63. LEADERSHIP in the realm of the four dimensions Embracing and Integrating all aspects of your being to lead authentically and effectively
- 64. SQ IQ EQ FQ PIRAMIDE VAN BALANS manage je energie 4 INTELLIGENTIES / DIMENSIES
- 67. SKILL = Your conscious Doing (FQ + IQ) TALENT = Your deeper Being (SQ) EMOTIONAL MATURITY (EQ) The effective bridge between the two
- 68. WE CAN ONLY BE AS EMOTIONALLY MATURE AS: What was taught to us What we have since chosen to learn & develop If we are running from commitment, we are also running from our pain, along with avoiding the responsibility of healing that pain.
- 71. Afbeelding met tekst, Lettertype, schermopname Automatisch gegenereerde beschrijving THE BEAUTY OF CONNECTION
- 73. HEALTH IS A MEANS TO DO WHAT GIVES MEANING TO LIFE Meaning is the strongest force for gaining health Machteld Huber Positieve Gezondheid
- 76. OVER DE SCHOONHEID VAN VERBINDING I AM BECAUSE WE ARE YOU DO NOT HAVE TO DO IT ALONE, YOU HAVE TO DO IT YOURSELF IF YOU LIFE & LET GO OF BEING PERFECT YOU BECOME UNSTOPPABLE
- 79. A maze is in the head The labyrinth in the body..
- 82. The road to success is (almost) never a straight line. Its a journey via detours, ups & downs, trials & challenges. A HEROS JOURNEY The difference between people who don't let themselves be defeated and people who lose their way? AGILITY Emotional Maturity
- 83. They face challenges, monsters and abysses. It is up to us, as guides and mentors, to help them find their inner strength and wisdom. However, this journey is not an easy walk on a smooth road; rather, it is the climb of the 2nd mountain. Joseph Campbell The Heros Journey The hero's journey is timeless because it reflects the universal journey of human existence.
- 84. "De Reis van de Held is tijdloos omdat het de universele reis van het menselijk bestaan weerspiegelt."
- 85. In the labyrinth you lose (only) that which no longer suits you Walking the labyrinth is a powerful and gentle way to feel and experience what still prevents you from being who you are from your core and become aware of your personal adventure to your core (Hero's Journey) De weg naar binnen - Bewustwording Wat & Wie past nog bij je? Wat hindert / belemmerd jou Het Middelpunt - Loslaten & Achterlaten Wat dient jou niet meer? De weg naar buiten - Manifesteren Op eigen benen staan Emotionele Volwassenheid VERTREK INITIATIE TERUGKEER
- 86. THE ART OF LETTING GO OF THAT WHAT HOLDS YOU BACK and to MANIFEST THAT WHAT YOU DESIRE
- 87. What is really important, relevant or valuable to you? Why do I do what I do? Who do I want to be? Who am I as a brother / sister, friend or colleague? How do I act in the (.) system? IS THERE A NEED / WISH THERE .. TO ? Y僚畤粁故 裡竜留僚 / Nosce Teipsum / Gnothi Seauton
- 88. THE ESSENTIAL IS INVISIBLE FOR THE EYES ONLY WITH YOUR HEART YOU CAN SEE WELL ANTOINE DE SAINT-EXUPRY (Schrijver van Le Petit Prince) Be brave I wish you Courage
- 89. 3 MEI 2025