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Grief Counseling in the High
School Setting
Deanna Ainsworth
University of West Alabama
SC540

Basic counselor roles are outlines.
Sample Crisis plan is discussed.
Tips are given to help staff address grief with
their students.
Sample group therapy is outlined.
Ethical and legal considerations are outlined.

Adolescents in high school may
experience grief in many different
ways.
They may experience the loss of a
parent, sibling, family member, friend,
acquaintance, or teacher.
By the time a child exits school, 40%
will experience the loss of a peer and
20% will have witnessed a death
("Guidelines for responding to the
death of a student or school staff,"
n.d.).

Often counselors are the one’s reporting the
loss to administration and in turn activate the
school’s crisis plan when dealing with a
traumatic loss.
Counselors are also notified of a death in the
family. The counselor would want to plan an
initial meeting with the student and possibly
consider group therapy.

Activate the school’s crisis team and coordinate
with administrators, other schools that may be
impacted, and any outside counseling resources.
1. Verify the information.
2. Determine what information should be released
with respect to the family’s wishes.
3. Formulate a plan on informing staff and students.

This can be done by administrators, school
guidance counselors, or district office
representatives.
A staff meeting should be held before school
to address what information is known, answer
any questions from staff, and formulate a plan
on how to address the students.

Many students may already know or have heard rumors of what has
happened.
Notification should be done face-to-face with a familiar teacher,
counselor, or staff member ("Guidelines for responding to the death of
a student or school staff," n.d.).
Often it is advisable for a guidance counselor or administrator to draft a
sample statement for teachers to read to their students. Some teachers
may feel uncomfortable discussing the incident with their students.
In the staff meeting, it should be clearly outlined what should and
should not be discussed with the students.

Saying nothing tells students their teacher is: uncaring, insensitive, unapproving, and
unconfident.
Teachers should:
Express concern
Be genuine
Invite conversation
Listen and observe
Limit personal sharing
Offer reassurance
(“Talking with children,” n.d.)

Identify students in need.
Meet individually with students to
outline group rules and establish
consent from parents/guardians.
Organize meeting place and times.
8 week program is suggested.
("Grief support groups in the school
setting: A guide for school
counselors," n.d.)

1. Telling the story.
2. Signs and symptoms of grief.
3. Physical symptoms of grief and the grief cycle.
4. The value of memories.
5. Exploring changes and regret.
6. Finding comfort in grief.
7. Personal growth.
8. Continuing bonds.
("Grief support groups in the school setting: A guide for school counselors," n.d.)

There are certain circumstances in which parents
may not want the cause of death disclosed.
Parent’s wishes must be honored, however, the
death itself must be addressed.
Counselors should also be aware that the
release of details may cause more harm to
students.

Decline in school performance.
Difficultly mastering new material.
May become more irritable, withdrawn, depressed, or anxious.
Partake in risky activities and behaviors.
Stay focused on loss.
("Guidelines for responding to the death of a student or school
staff," n.d.)

Lake Havasu High School’s Mission Statement: "...we are
dedicated to challenging our students, to delivering a
rigorous curriculum, to developing responsible citizens,
and to forming positive relationships.”
Improperly counseled students cannot become productive
and responsible citizens who are capable of forming
positive relationships.
Grief is capable of consuming all aspects of a students life;
whether it is at home, at school, or amongst relationships.

Grief support groups in the school setting: A guide for school counselors. (n.d.). Retrieved from
https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=/slideshow/video-presentation-grief-counseling/44659567/s&source=web&cd=1&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CB4QFjAA&url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.seattleu.edu%2Fup
loadedFiles%2FCOE%2FPrograms%2FCounseling%2FCurrent_Students%2FEvents_Documents%2FGrief%2520Resource.pdf&ei=4U3WVLKdH8zagwTX1ID
ACA&usg=AFQjCNHhmHi-RvX5N79wBxtXzNQXCXTtbw&sig2=2hWf0LCrFxkov4ZOfr8mKA&bvm=bv.85464276,d.eXY
Guidelines for responding to the death of a student or school staff. (n.d.). Retrieved from
http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=2&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CCQQFjAB&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.cincinnatichildrens.
org%2FWorkArea%2FDownloadAsset.aspx%3Fid%3D77092&ei=OkjWVJ7FKIegNrW1gbgN&usg=AFQjCNEkD_V2yntFw9so6jmtCd30DInmpg&sig2=iY0Ni
uY4aYPwFdPmBxQPZQ
Helping children cope with death. (n.d.). Retrieved February 7, 2015, from http://www.madd.org/victim-services/finding-support/victim-resources/helping-children-cope-
with.pdf
[Photograph of chairs]. Retrieved from
http://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CAcQjRw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.minddisorders.com
%2FFlu-Inv%2FGroup-
therapy.html&ei=jU_WVLjCAYayggS1wYGgDg&bvm=bv.85464276,d.eXY&psig=AFQjCNH8MDuM5MUE50u5vWRVlAyaNz94sg&ust=142341761084469
1
[Photograph of hands covering face]. Retrieved from
http://www.google.com/url?sa=i&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=images&cd=&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0CAcQjRw&url=http%3A%2F%2Fannarborcounselingservice
s.com%2Fservices%2Fgrief-counseling%2F&ei=uE_WVIDHDNOTNrvNglg&bvm=bv.85464276,d.eXY&psig=AFQjCNGU1-
5aJo_ejdKUDt3bZBp_pG4H7g&ust=1423417652391938
Talking with children. (n.d.). Retrieved February 7, 2015, from http://grievingstudents.scholastic.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/NYL-1A-Talking-With-Children.pdf
Teachers dealing with trauma and grief [Video file]. (n.d.). Retrieved from https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PnOvH1Qv8L0

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Grief Counseling in High School

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