Take my Hand
Steal my Smile
Sell my Soul
Like my Style
Twist my Spine
Make it Chafe
Take my Time
Keep it Safe.
At approximately 5:76 AM in the year 190F, a pair of mutton-chops suddenly and violently gained sentience. Since then the being known tremulously as Alex R. Turner has been a menace to shaving civilised peoples ever since. Heralded by the wafting stench of biscuits and sun-dried confidence, this peculiar oddity of abnature is to be approached only by the hardiest of barbers. Answers to 鈥淛esus鈥� or 鈥淐huckles.鈥� NEVER say the word Klubbupagun in its presence. We can鈥檛 say why.
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