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The unlikely appearance of Theon Fanny.
He claims to sell real estate and he is looking for an opportunity to expand his network.
The organisers from “Pecha Kucha on tour” thought;
“Okay, let's give this bloke a chance". Whether you believe this or not.

1.
I gave the following idea a lot of consideration. Whether to do it or not, to propose it here or not. To open up. It took me quite
some time to reassure myself that this is what I wanted to do. Come forward with my idea and ask your humble opinions.

2.
I needed to focus and look beyond. And there is only one way to do it:
Start from scratch. So the idea here is to sell my estate. To acquire some new and start all over. Allow me to grab the
opportunity of this pech kucha to share this yet concealed information. Don’t be fooled here, the question is not whether I
would sell. Eventually I will. The question is though, how and when.

3.
I never sold real estate before. It even seems an eternity since I acquired this lot. So I did some research. Trying to find specialized
magazines and websites to find valuable tips to sell the real estate I desperately want to get rid off. It’s pretty logical what is in there, I…
we, all know this; but it is good to have it right in front of your nose.

4.
Wash your windows and get some of the furniture out, so there is more space. When the place looks more spacious. It looks bigger.
Does the place have some historical value? Authentic information? An antique door bell? It might give a nice ring to the house. It might be a
selling argument. Even if you live in a tower, initial inhabitants, for example Dustin Hoffman, might give your estate a good Hook to sell with.

5.
To end with the price,
to begin with the size
of the estate, the current rate
of loans, the antique stairs,
the wooden floor,
The sewer that stank,
the loose door,
the advance at the bank.

The current trends in the
home selling market.
You have a car
where do you park it?

The hole in the roof,
the old water pipes
and the new heating system.

Maybe some windows need
to be repaired by you,
and you will need a good
photographer for the real
estate agents too.

6.
You maybe need to
repaint some walls or
install a new
bathroom.

When trying to sell a
house, it is better to
put in some extra
expenses instead of
lowering the price.
Better an investment
of 5 grand than a
price reduction of 5
grand.

Most buyers want to
buy a house without
thinking of
constructing, they
might think of
reconstruction, but
that’s something else.
Dare to invest.

Word of mouth
works, tell your
family, friends, the
neighbours that you
are selling the place.

7.
Working on emotions it’s not lying, it is –er- stimulating people.
When having a tour around the house, take down your family pictures, People want to imagine themselves living there and not want to see
how you did. Create a cosey atmosphere, show natural fibers, woodwork or get the plaster of the bricks or another idea might be to bake
bread. The smell of bread is the summit of cosiness.

8.
The current state of my real estate. It is a pity.
The initial renters first had a premium place. They even considered it being a
paradise, but they broke their contract. I forgave them. We came clean and I
reallocated them, I offered them their current habitat. Their family is still living
there, but they made such a mess out off the place. I have to kick them out,...

9.
You make an acquisition, with a nice plan in the back of your head. You know how it goes, none of it came true and now I am stuck with
those renters. Breaking a contract just like that is NOT a good option. The renters would protest or even sue... But I found a backdoor to
refuse the prolonging their contract. I would move in myself. So I send them an offical request to leave.

10.
And the damage...
The insurance refused to accept my claims. Neglectance, they say. I neglected the place for too long, The damage is partly my fault. I know I
neglected to go and see for myself. But I did send my Son; He made some remarks to the renters at the time. They didn’t accept his advice.
The situation deteriorated. I even send Him back. But it all went down hill...

11.
The damage is partly my fault.
True. The renters didn’t respect the property but I should have know. To be frank I did, but I lacked the time to invest in the
project. At the time I move in... mysterious ways, I would start to reconstruct immediately.

12.
It is not that I will say to potential buyers that the place once was infested with giant reptiles, dinosaurs or anthropoid apes. No-no-no.
The truth is something entirely else. No need to mention the pollution, radiaton or mass killings.
I would say that I build the place with my own hands.
It has emotional value, authentic with a distinguished and rare character. The blue marble.

13.
The earth, also called Terra, is a quiet place. If it had the size of a pea, the first planet Jupiter would be 300 meters far. That way. The
second Pluto would be 1,6 kilometers. 71 percent of the earth is covered by water. The abundance of water on Earth's surface is a unique
feature that distinguishes the "Blue Planet" from others in the Solar System. It made it also possible to have an atmosphere.

Acquiring a livable planet like earth, is a high involvement buying decision. So I provided Nasa’s fact sheet for potential buyers.The
earth’s volume is 1.08 times 10 to the twelveth cubic km. Its mass is approximately 5 point nintyeight times 10 to exponential
24
kg. It is composed mostly of 32.1% of iron, 30% oxygen, silicon (15.1%), magnesium (13.9%), and than you’ll find sulfur,
nickel, aluminium, calcium, ...

15.
Talking about calcium. You know Gyproc? Gyproc is divine. To camouflage. You cannot repair holes in te wall? Put Gyproc. Unsolid
ceilings? Gyproc.You can gyproc to camouflage anything. Unfortunately, I cannot put gyproc all over the world. Or it would be all over
the industrial p...-wait wait... There is a better idea. I have done it before. I will flood the place. I’ll bust the heating system. The poles will
melt, the sea level will rise. Damage? ... Gone.

16.
An even better idea. The tilt of the earth now is 23, 45% percent.
Meaning the earth’s axis is not vertical. A slight adaption of this angle might increase the level of sunlight reaching earth with 23,5
percent. If I would increase the hook of the axis to a horizontal position... The consequence of this action would result that for a half year
one half of the earth would see the sun, and for the other half the other half.

17.
Meaning that every half year or the Northpole or the Southpole would melt down. One part of earth would be extremely cold, the other
one hot. Instead of four there would be at least six seasons. A dynamical weather plan, which would manifest itself in a wildly spread
flourishing nature.

18.
The Edelweiss would grow next to the hibernating palm trees. The grass isn’t greener on the proverbial other side of the planet. And
another advantage: the lasting inhabitants who didn’t want to move out, would need to live on the equator. Constantly on the move to
remain on the borderzone of hot and cold. Well.
They would get extinct in the end.

19.
What I also learned from the specialized mags is; I would hire four lawyers. Just In case.
For one, to make sure everyone would move out (I hear their meteor-dust-cloud-technique is quite effective too), secondly to confiscate
some NASA-equipment, like the HUBBLE, for all the damages done. So nice pictures of the real estate can be made.

20.
One more thing.

Disassociate yourself with your home.
This is just another planet.
Beat it.

For questions, remarks
or bids,

please contact me
through prayer.

Theon Fanny joins a Pecha Kucha

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Theon Fanny joins a Pecha Kucha

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